Attracted is a strong word. Remember, I ain't no queer. I would say more like intrigued by that international man of mystery with his manly mustache and impeccable manners.
In fact, I would be willing to bet that he knows how to fold a napkin and which side of the plate fork and the spoon go on. I always screw that up. I think I need to make some notes or something. That's because, unlike some of the rude folks on this board, "Belvie" - as his closest friends call him - is a man of great class and sophistication.
Now, Alf on the other hand, I'll admit that I straight up wanted to show that witty little alien my Gordon Shumway (if you know what I mean).
Alas, turns out he wasn't an actual alien at all. Rather, Alf was merely a puppet played by an actor and a puppeteer.
Talk about your blue balls! That whole affair left me terribly confused and ultimately embittered.
Still, you have to admit, Alf was one sexy alien puppet. In fact, I would argue that America's three sexiest aliens of the past 50 years were Alf, Mork from Ork and Desi Arnez. Maybe throw Ricky Martin on that list too.
As I said before, I ain't no queer, but Ricky Martin could really shake his maracas (if you catch my drift) and Livin la Vida Loca touched my soul in a very personal and meaningful way.
Call it my alien phase.
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