It's kind of funny I have a similar story but I said yes. I really had no interest in Steve Miller and don't appreciate his music but it was a good show and I was surprised I had a good time at the "party". Just this past weekend I was telling my son one of the keys to enjoying life was finding a way to say yes. I then had to provide a disclaimer about drugs and other illegal stuff. Anyhow, I remember my Dad telling me the summer the summer before attending Pitt as a Freshman, he told me to just say yes when you want to say no when someone wants to spend time with you but it's on their terms. It's the key to friendship and essential to really building a bunch of experiences. I kind of thought he was just saying Dad stuff but I have used this often. I honestly think I have better memories from the reluctant yes than all the things on my agenda.
Your father was absolutely right. I wish I had gotten the same advice and was wise/humble enough to follow it.
In fact, it took me a long time to understand that cynicism is a disease that you have to constantly fight off – particularly if you are, like me, naturally cynical about people and their motivations.
I don't think people are inherently good or bad. However, I do think that most people are naturally selfish or at the very least self-interested.
There is almost always an angle and being able to quickly figure out just what that angle is has been one of my strengths and his allowed me to have some small success both personally and professionally.
Also, people will let you down. In most cases it's not a matter of if but when. Also, when they do let you down, it will probably be in the worst way imaginable.
That is why you have to be very careful in choosing your friends/spouses and heroes because far more often than not, they will let you down. Unfortunately, i have been forced to learn that lesson again and again and again over the years.
However, none of that matters. You have to choose to be optimistic about things. You have to choose to believe in people and causes anyway. Otherwise, you will end up sad and bitter and alone. I really do think my wife and her family taught me that lesson.
They are just really good people and very positive about most people and things. I used to see that as naïveté and a bit of a weakness. That made me very protective of my wife in particular. However, I now see their seemingly boundless optimism and grace as a choice, which makes it strength that I hope we are able to impart on our two little boys.
Finally, you have to choose your spouse wisely. If you make a good choice in that regard your life will take a dramatically different trajectory than if you make a bad choice.
Don't be an idiot and choose the prettiest girl who wants to bang you too. Be smart. You should still choose a girl that you're attracted to but pick someone that will feed you soup when you're sick and who will lift you up when you're down. Choose someone who you think will be a good mother one day.
Most of all, just pick someone you like spending time with whenever you are fully clothed. That is much easier advice to give than to receive but it's also tried and true wisdom from someone who has been there and who by the grace of God did chose wisely. Had I chosen a different path, my life would be totally different and much, much worse.
